Almost there, almost there. You can tell when a group full of people have been doing NaNo too long, because the following seems hilariously funny:

- I always said they should make a reality TV show of Clarion, but what about NaNoWriMo?
- You could totally do that.
- Give twelve lucky people a chance to live in a big house with unlimited writing time and space, away from their real lives, the only down side is that they all have to produce 50,000 words, and obviously they’d all go insane. Screened live 24 hours on the web.
- Can there be a Big Brother style voice that gives them annoying writing exercises and tips like ‘write a scene with a robot zombie’?
- Does the winner get published? No matter how bad their book is?
- Ha, people would buy it anyway
- NaNoWriMo the Series: 30 Days, No Excuses
- Give them everything that writers say they need: hardware, time and space to do nothing but write, separation from jobs and family
- People would kill to get in there
- There would have to be catering, really good catering
- Do we vote people out?
(quick vote in room decides no voting people out)
- We want them to have to stay until the bitter end
- Maybe we evict them all as soon as they hit 50K
- So what, you end up with thousands of people watching an empty house with one person typing
- I’d watch that!
- Put all the books up on Lulu.com and they can all be published!
- Did you know that the average number of copies sold of a self-published book is 47? Or was it 9…
(conversation is derailed in order to discuss Harlequin Horizons)

Me: Okay the bad news is I’ve been here half an hour and written nothing, the good news is I know what I’m blogging about tonight.

EDIT: I totally forgot to include the part of the conversation where celebrities tape encouraging messages and writing tips to be beamed into the house – and Nathan Fillion opens buttons on his shirt to encourage high wordcounts (writers who don’t meet their day’s target are sent to the naughty room so as not to see Nathan opening the button on his shirt)

- so the house is only open to women and gay guys?
- no, but if straight men aren’t inspired by Nathan Fillion they will just have to dig deeper and use the experience of watching another man undress in their fiction. Grist for the mill! Grist for the mill!

EDIT EDIT: I also forgot the part where someone pointed out that there is always one who managed to complete NaNo in the first 3 days and I announced this was no longer a theoretical exercise and had become a murder mystery waiting to be written…

Tags: nanowrimo